Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Great first date

I just had the best first date I've had in years. We got along great. We had fun together. I like her a lot and she seems to be crazy about me too. We're hanging out first thing tomorrow morning again.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Coffee as a writing aid

There are some writers who think stimulants help you write better. I've heard stories about guys like Aaron Sorkin taking drugs so they can keep writing all night. Looking at the number of West Wing scripts he churned out himself over the course of a season, it kind of makes sense.

I recently watched an interview with Stephen King when he spoke with some candor about it, saying that in the short term it did help. To quote him, 'They call it Bolivian Marching Powder for a reason." He then went on to describe how much it screwed him up when he became dependent on it. Apparently he doesn't even remember writing Cujo, he was that doped up.

So even if I could afford to get a few grams of cocaine before a writing session, I wouldn't want to. However, there is a more PG version, and that's coffee.

There was a coffee maker at my old office, and I drank too much every day, and got dependent on it. I weaned myself off, and felt better for it. Now I don't drink coffee with any regularity, so when I have even one cup I feel the effects.

I have a lot of writing to get done today, and I haven't been productive this week. So today I used my coffee maker for the first time in at least a couple months to make a couple cups of Dunkin' Donuts Dark Roast. And it helped. I have energy, and I just finished the first pass of Act Two of my spec script.

I think the trick is to keep using coffee sparingly. If I tried to do this every day it would stop working. And get expensive.

For now, I'm going to take a short break, get some food, and go get my car washed in preparation for tomorrow (and because there is just months of LA on my car). Then I'll come back and work on Act Three.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Was not productive today

I meant to get a lot more done today than I did.

The Office is partly to blame. We have a house guest mowing through the seasons of it, and I'd never seen most of it before, so I find myself watching with her.

And I was out late last night, got up late this morning, and waited until mid-afternoon to shower and change out of pajamas. I've decided that even though I'm writing and working from my desk in my bedroom, I'm still more productive if I get up like I'm actually working in the morning, shower, and change into regular clothing.

I went to a TV writer's thing on Wed night, and there was actually another one scheduled tonight. The official starting time is 10pm, and it's 10:23 right now. Technically I could leave right now and still be on the early side of things. But really, I don't want to go spend more money at any bars tonight, and I don't want to stay out late like I know I will if I go.

I met a girl at the Wed night one that I'm seeing on Monday. I talked to her yesterday and she said there was a chance she'd be at the thing tonight, but I don't think it would be worth the hassle to head over there if she was only going to show up at the end. Plus I don't want to go too out of my way to see her. We have an afternoon date planned for Monday, I can wait until then, and honestly, it will probably mean a more productive day for me tomorrow.

I think I'll even set my alarm. I've been sleeping in for weeks. I'm going to try and nip some of these slacker tendencies in the bud. Plus, if I finish the work I need to do on my spec tomorrow I can take even more time for Monday if I want. Ironically, I can even call my date on Monday research, since I'm writing a feature script featuring the place we're planning on going as a first date spot. It might be a bit of life imitating art, but with the art being revised based on the life part.

But really, based on the night we met I kind of like this girl, so I want things to go well. I always get excited about first dates. I'm an optimist about how things will turn out I guess. But even taking that into account, I have a good feeling about this girl. Knock on wood, keep your fingers crossed.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Met with some writers last night

Last night I went to a get together of other aspiring TV writers here in Hollywood. Technically it's for aspiring and current, but in our small group everyone was aspiring.

That being said, it was still a really nice night. Sure nobody there was in the position to give me a job, but they were all nice people and I liked talking to them. We all seemed to be on the same page about various TV shows and I liked it.

There was also a young woman there who just recently made her move out to LA to follow the same path I've been on. We had a really nice talk, and made plans to hang out again soon. I don't want to get into more detail than that, because I've been having a weird string of luck regarding first and second dates recently. I actually like this girl, and so I don't want to do anything to jinx it until I have a clearer idea of whether we'd get along or not.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

My Saturday night just imploded.

I had plans for tonight, and they just fell through at the last minute. Since I'm so broke as to worry about things like quickly approaching IRS payments and rent, this isn't one of those nights where I feel up to just going out into Hollywood on my own. Instead I'm just sitting around my bedroom, listening to music I bought when I was 10 and looking at too much Twitter and Facebook, pondering things like the fact that in my life I've already had more than one girl say she loved me and mean it. And how maybe I've taken that kind of thing for granted more than I should.

I guess I've always had this assumption that when I'm finally ready to settle down I'll find another girl that I love who will love me back, since it seemed so easy before.

I think it's just the combination of being unemployed, broke, and single is starting to get to me a little. Maybe I'll use some of tonight to write, that might help me feel a little more like I'm on the path to something other than being forced to move back east and teach screenwriting to people who will never have the balls to move to LA.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Dollhouse gets picked up!

This is very good news. The show started off weak. I'll admit it. It was still a well written show and a great concept, but the original pilot script was much better than what ended up airing for the first episode. I think there were too many people "helping" by making all the notes about new and exciting ways to look at Eliza Dushku's ass. And while like many other warm blooded men I am a fan of Eliza Dushku's ass, I can see it in some copy of Maxim if I want. On TV, I want to see her in a real story.

The second half of the first season got good. I mean really good. You could tell they stopped trying to make interchangeable episodes about brainwashed hookers and started making a real drama with in depth characters (even the ones who had their minds wiped every other day) and some really entertaining stuff.

It's not as good as Firefly. That show should have been on for at least 5 seasons, and it would have been fantastic. But I think Dollhouse will still be able to surprise us now that they've been given a chance to really prove themselves.

I'm also celebrating this as a victory because it means somebody finally worked through their inbox and saw the DVR and online view numbers instead of just looking at the obsolete Nielson ratings.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

So damn broke

I've been out of the job for a month and a half now. Which means I've had to pay rent for April and May already, which pretty much ate through my savings. June 1st is rapidly approaching, which is bad enough, but I also got word back from the IRS that I owe an amount close to one month's rent. Basically my taxes were all screwy because my old bosses were lazy and didn't pay us through a payroll company for 6 months, so half of my income was totally fine with my W2, the other half wasn't, and when I tried to reconcile that I must have done something wrong.

Ugh.

I filed for unemployment, which I didn't do last time I was unemployed, but so far all I've gotten is a couple hundred bucks. I see a flaw in the system. If the point of it is to insure that people can stay afloat while hunting for a new job, why does it take a month to get such a small amount? If I were living completely paycheck to paycheck before this happened I'd have been this screwed a month ago and the small amount I've received wouldn't have done much.

I understand it's tough, and that I'm basically getting free money from a state that's going bankrupt, but I can't help but point out the discrepancy between the goal of the program and it's actual execution.

And the thing is, it's not even like I'm failing at the job search. I just had a second interview Monday night, sent them writing samples on Tuesday, and just received word today that they want to have a follow up phone call with me. Even if I don't get the job, I'm doing what I'm supposed to.

Being unemployed sucks. Our generation has basically been put in the position that unless we sell out and go for something that pays us a ridiculous amount of money (and even that can backfire, just look at anyone you know who became an investment banker after college) there's no way to support yourself without going into crippling debt. Fix the damn economy people, I'd like to not think of a burrito as an extravagant expense.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Old CD's

I finally got around to importing all my old CD's into iTunes, and man, I'd forgotten I had some of this stuff. I'm talking random things I haven't even thought about since the 90's like Soundgarden.

Since I have a 6 disc changer in the trunk of my car I never get around to changing what CD's are in there for months at a time. The only things I had on my computer for the most part were random songs I had downloaded during college when people still used the original Napster.

This is good though, I'll finally listen to some of the stuff I own again. Now all I have to do is break down and finally buy an iPod or something (I'm one of the last people I know who's never broken down and bought one).

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Why am I Cougar-bait?

The past year, every girl that's flirted with me seems to be at least a year or two older. This is perplexing to me.

Technically they're not Cougars, and really, there's not much of a difference between age 27 and age 25 in LA, but it's still a strange pattern. Is it because I seem mature, or because I seem immature and they're trying to reclaim their youth?

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Why is it...

...that all the most fantastic girls are practically married to some guy they've been dating for six years? And it's not the silly romantic comedy thing where the guy is a douchebag and the chick must be saved from making a big mistake with him. If she's cool, chances are he is too and if I knew him I'd want to be his friend.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

MissCrazy drunk emailed me

MissCrazy sent me an email around 1am last night saying, "I'm a little drunk and will regret this in the morning. I miss you."

I still haven't responded. I'm not sure if I should or if she even wants me to.

My best bet is that she was out last night, got a little drunk/horny, felt a little lonely, and remembered that we had fun together. I get it. When you're alone, even a person who's not right for you is better than nobody at all.

I want to be a nice guy and find the right thing to say back to her, but to what end? I don't want to get back together with her. I don't want to hook up "one last time", even if that statement wasn't total bullshit (there's no such thing as one last time).

I'm broke, unemployed, alone, and trying to be a freaking writer in Hollywood. Saying it like that sounds kind of depressing. I don't need to add some girl drama to that mix.

Still, I feel like I'd be an asshole if I didn't say anything to her.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Noticed an Earthquake!

We just had a little earthquake here in L.A. Registered 4.4 on the Richter scale, centered in Westlake Village. I actually noticed it this time.

I was sitting in bed watching this week's scrubs, and it felt like my bed was shaking for a few seconds. When nobody else noticed it I almost convinced myself it was just a really big truck driving by on Highland Ave (right outside my window), but then people on facebook and twitter also commented. Thank you social networking.

This makes me kinda happy because I've somehow missed all the other ones since I moved here two and a half years ago, even the notable one we had last summer.

I almost feel like I have some more authority as an Angeleno now, as lame as that sounds.

Strange Dreams

Since I'm finally getting enough sleep for the first time in a while, I'm remembering my dreams again. Not all of them, just the really vivid ones from right before I wake up. And even those fade pretty quickly.

The other night, there was something about how someone had messed something up, and three nukes were going to go off. The only thing I remember clearly is that it was exactly three bombs, and when they went off I was laying on the ground, with my head turned away from the explosion. That's kind of a messed up dream.

Last night, I had a dream that I was acting in something with a really pretty girl, who seemed like someone I felt like I had gone to school with or something, but upon later reflection seemed to look like the actress from Legend of the Seeker. I met up with my best friend from high school and the two of us went to some park. There we went off on our separate ways, and I sat on this ridge looking down at the park to where they were doing some blasting for construction. The girl I was acting with came over and sat with me. She jokingly sat in my lap, and asked how I felt about her. I said that my character was in love with her character. She got up to walk away. I then finished my statement with, "but I think you're pretty swell too." She smiled, and kissed me.

Then I woke up.

I don't interpret dreams. I have no idea what that one means. I'll probably remember it for a while now that I've written it down.

The reason I bring it up is this: Does that ever happen to you when you start to hook up with someone in a dream, but you wake up before things get really good? Then you try to go back to sleep and pick up where you left off, but you can't.

I can't remember that many of the details, but I remember how I felt about this girl in my dream. I was really into her. And having her like me too, laughing and sitting with me on the grass in that park, felt really good. I'm less upset that I didn't get laid in the dream and more upset that I didn't get to have that feeling longer. Because if felt like falling in love, which is something I haven't felt in a really long time. long enough that I think I was starting to forget what it felt like, since my only frame of reference in recent years has been getting to know a girl I kind of like, not falling head over heels about someone.