Friday, December 18, 2009

Busy night last night

First there was the office holiday party, for which i had to remove everything on my desk to make it a food table (all recently put back together this morning). Shared a couple glasses of wine with bosses, talked to some colleagues. They invited Writress as well which was nice of them. Unfortunately I wasn't able to stick around for all of the food because my college alumni network set up an event last night as well, in which some alum actors were reading work by alum writers for workshopping purposes, and they were reading pages from my webseries.

The event was hosted by an alum in her husband way out by Malibu, so it took a while to get there, but their place was really nice. The husband is a very prominent screenwriter. I won't say who he is, but unless you're living in a cave in Afghanistan you've seen at least a couple of his movies. The cave-dwellers may have only seen one. They had this amazing screening room/home theater set up where we met, and the screenwriter and his wife were very welcoming, made us fresh popcorn with their popcorn maker, and listened into the readings and gave great notes. Makes me wish I had a better sample read instead of my foul-mouthed web series.

Tonight I'm having a "last night in town" dinner with Writress, drinking some coffee, then going to a very late screening of Avatar in IMAX 3D. I've been avoiding spoilers as much as possible, so I'm excited to see it.

Then tomorrow morning I'm finishing up all my packing, heading to the airport, and flying out to Boston. Looking forward to sleeping in a lot for the next couple weeks. That and seeing family and friends.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Glad people are flakey

We had this big amazing holiday dinner last night at my apartment, and everyone brought something. I made Wassell, this traditional hot holiday cider, and the Writress made home-made lasagna (and scored about a zillion girlfriend points in the process).

I can't wait to just go home and eat leftovers and relax tonight, so I'm very glad that the person I'm supposed to meet for drinks tonight had to reschedule. I'm going to go home and get my comfy on, and it'll be brilliant.

Monday, December 7, 2009


I'm a story junkie. Ever since I was a kid, I've always loved telling stories, being told stories, reading great stories, and watching great movies and TV.

Then came the video games. Specifically, RPG's. Even more specifically, Bioware RPG's. That company makes story writing the very most important element of their work, which is why their games always elicit great joy in me.

Case in point, I got a copy of Dragon Age: Origins when I was shopping on Cyber-Monday and got a great deal. This past weekend went to playing that game with the Writress. While it is technically a one-player game, you spend most of the time making choices, and choosing dialogue. These are things you can do with a friend or two, and the game is engaging to watch. We're playing this great choose-your-own-adventure with awesome cause-and-effect stuff going on, and it's just great.

I call it "story-crack" because it's so addictive and fun for story freaks like me and the Writress. It's a rainy day here in Los Angeles, and LA's version of winter has settled in so it's a chilly high of 55 degrees. I was gonna have drinks with an agency assistant/aspiring writer tonight, but I'm postponing them because all I wanna do is get comfy with the Writress and kill darkspawn. She was about to text me that all she wanted to do tonight was that as well when I sent her the message. We're very in sync like that, which is why she's great.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Yep, getting sick

I think I was also sick a year ago. I blame the airplanes.

There's this big Junior Hollywood party tonight that I could be going to. It's right near my apartment and everything. But I don't see the upside in paying $30-40 when it's a cash bar. I won't be making that many useful new connections. I have a girlfriend, so I don't need to go to these events to get laid.

I need to be at work early in the morning, so I think instead I'm going to go home, make some soup, and watch Colbert while doing my laundry. Is it sad that I'm getting excited for this?

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Pitched my new idea last night

My writing group has the advantage of being able to pull from alumni to speak at panels and give ideas. Last night I was able to pitch my half hour sitcom idea to a comedy exec from ABC and a writer from "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia."

I've pitched before, a bit, but have been on few official, in-office pitches. I didn't do much planning, really just beefed up my character bios and went through it in that way. To be frank, I was kind of winging it.

And the first reaction I get from the ABC guy is, "Very well presented, I liked the structure of your pitch." The conversation then steered into notes on the idea itself, which were very helpful, especially since I'm approaching this as someone who thinks like a one hour writer, not a sitcom writer.

It's just funny that I got a note praising my preparedness when I was pretty sure I was under-prepared.

I think what it really comes down to is whether or not you can speak clearly about a subject in a room. If you're writing a script, you should know it well enough to not really need to read from a crib sheet in giving your presentation.

Hopefully this means I'll be good at pitching. It's a necessary skill that a lot of writers either don't have, or struggle to develop.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The overdue post

Until now I haven't really had a free moment at work or at home to post on here, but now my bosses are gone, and since it's Thanksgiving week the town is quiet enough that I can take a few moments to write about my various adventures.

I'll start with the road trip.

A couple weeks ago, Writress got a call from her best friend from college. Turns out that she and her boyfriend of five years (also a very good friend of Writress) just got engaged. He'd surprised her with a trip to Hawaii for their 5 year anniversary and proposed. It must be nice to get paid enough to do that kind of stuff. But anyways, that weekend they were planning an overdue housewarming party at their place in San Francisco, and it was becoming a "holy crap we just got engaged" party. As soon as Writress hung up, I said that we should totally drive up and surprise them.

Writress sent her friend an email, saying she was really sorry but wouldn't be able to make it up. Then on that Saturday morning, we got in Writress's car (the same kind of car I have, except hers had GPS) and started driving North. We took the fast way up, driving through the lack of landscape that is the central valley in California. Seriously, once you've seen it once there isn't much reason to see it again. But roadtripping is fun, so Writress and I kept each other entertained. The most memorable thing we saw was a lot of signs that said "Congress Created this Dustbowl" because the farmers were pissed that Congress wouldn't roll back environmental protections on the rivers that they wanted to use for additional irrigation.

I drove over the Bay Bridge into San Francisco around 12:30, and saw the city for the first time. We drove around, saw some sights, then went to Union Square to get lunch at Writress's favorite Thai noodle place from college. Then we caught up with a friend of mine from high school, and the three of us went over the Golden Gate Bridge, saw Saucilito, then walked around Fisherman's Wharf at night. We saw a bunch of smelly Sea Lions all sleeping on top of each other on these barges, and while I'm sure they are perfectly happy there, they were so crowded that it looked like that first shot of the inside of the spaceship in District 9.

Writress and my friend also tried to trick me into walking by "The Bush Man", but I got wise to their plan. For those of you who don't know, there's this guy who hangs out by the wharf in SF with a bunch of fake branches, so he looks like a bush. When people walk by, he stick a branch out to scare them. Then he collects tips from onlookers. We saw him get one chick pretty good, which was funny.

We then dropped my friend off at her place, and went in search of Writress's engaged friends. They live in the 23rd floor of this 42 story high rise condo, complete with a doorman (so unlike LA apartments). I guess the protocol is that people walk into the lobby, say that they're here to see so-and-so from unit such-and-such, and the guy calls up. We set up a plan to use the names of other friends of Writress if it came to it (although good thing it didn't because these friends had very asian names, and let's face it, I couldn't really pull that off). We walking in with a bottle of champagne like we were expected, and the guy let us up the elevator. We went upstairs, knocked on the door and covered up the peephole with a thumb. The groom-to-be opened the door, saw us, and exclaimed "HOLY SHIT!". The bride-to-be dropped the phone, and ran over excited like crazy.

We totally made their night, and it was great. The party was fun, hanging out with Writress's ballroom dancing friends. I showed them my, "spin the girl a lot and they think you know how to dance" tactic.

We went to get out stuff from Writress's car as the party was breaking up, as we were gonna crash on the couch. We sat and talked on a bench for a bit, and told each other that we loved each other. It was nice. I can genuinely say that about someone for the first time since college. We're really great together, and I'm very happy that I went to that writer's meetup 6 months ago and met her.

The next morning we woke up early (windows faced east, sun was like a laser beam). We drove over to Writress's college, so I got to see that. Then we started driving back. We drove to Monterrey/Carmel which was really pretty, then got on California 1 heading south.

It was breathtakingly beautiful, and the road winded back and forth which made for fun, if slow and tiring, driving. We periodically stopped to just look at the view and take a few pictures, and it was nice. We stopped at Hearst Castle, but when we saw how expensive the tour was and how long it would take, we got back in the car. We came upon Santa Barbara while it was already getting dark, so we didn't stop. We made it back to my place in LA by 6:40, and were exhausted for the rest of the night.

Now, on top of this story is the stuff that happened with my roommate, but I'm going to save that for another post. Stay tuned kids.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

There's stuff I need to post about

There's a bunch I need to post about, but the reason there's so much to post about is that I'm so busy...which means I don't have time to post. Crazy.

Things of note that have happened:

1) Epic road trip to San Francisco and back down the California Coast, saw old friends, surprised Writress' friends.

2) L bombs dropped with Writress, feeling very good about that

3) What I thought was some heavy ridiculous drama with Roommate turned out to be something else, but still very blog-worthy.

Tonight Writress and I are really looking forward to having a night to veg out, watch TV, and crash. We haven't been able to do that in over a week.

Can't wait for Thanksgiving...and Christmas. Thinking most about the time I'll have to sleep.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Being Spontaneous

While we were heading over to Roommate's comedy show on Monday night, the Writress got a call from her best friend from college with the happy news that she had just gotten engaged to the guy she'd been dating for the past 5 years.

They're two of Writress's best friends in the world, and they live up in San Francisco. I've been wanting to make that road trip ever since I moved to California anyway, so we thought it would be fun to head up there this weekend for their housewarming/engagement party.

They don't know we're coming, so it should be a big surprise for them. Plus I'll get a chance to see people I know in San Francisco, and see all the touristy stuff.

On a whim I also decided to set up a version of "The Black List" for TV pilots. For those of you who don't know, The Black List is an annual list of the best unproduced feature scripts of the year. Scripts like "Juno" and "Lars and the Real Girl" were on there before they became movies that won a zillion awards. I'm setting up a similar one for TV pilots. It's probably a ton of extra work, but maybe I'll ask Writress to help or something. Plus I can make good contacts with it, contacts who read TV scripts, and might be willing to read my pilot.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Meeting went well

I had my meeting. It went pretty well.

Even though she recognized my name as someone else on one of her tracking boards, she treated me like a for-real writer, assuming I had other general meetings like this set up all over town.

She told me how much she loved my pilot, and was kept engrossed despite the fact that half of it takes place in a video game and she "bought a Wii but doesn't use it."

She told me about the shows they're working on that will likely be staffing in the coming months, I was interested, and would love to work on any of them.

Even if it leads to nothing it was a worthwhile experience, but at the same time I can't help but hope that it can lead to a chance to join the writing staff of one of their shows.

Here's hoping for the best.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

John August responded to my post

I'm being and advice seeking whore this week in prep for my meeting next week. I even asked a question of screenwriting blogger John August, who responded.

It's a lot of what I was already pretty sure I knew, which is good. It shows I'm not too clueless or in over my head.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Looking ahead

My boss mentioned my aspirations to write today, saying he'd like to read my script after Thanksgiving, but that basically he would rather I spent my nights having drinks meetings with assistants that could help him out. I'm going to try to split the difference and keep doing both.

My credit card company sent me a letter saying that in a month and a half they're going to jack up all my interest rates for no damn reason (they're blaming it something like how a payment was a day late when the due date was on a day they were closed). So now my previously manageable balance is looking rather scary. Not sure what I'm going to do about that, but I'll think of something.

I have a panel discussion tonight for my pilot writing program with two people who've read and liked my work before on it, so I'm looking forward to that.

Things are still going great with the Writress. It's been over 5 months now, and we haven't had so much as a disagreement. It's comfortable, and nice, and relaxing. We enjoy each others' company, have a ton in common, and there's no bullshit drama. I'm pretty happy with things.

And so looking ahead, I just need to keep doing what I'm doing, while trying not to get crushed by a VISA bill.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Got my meeting

I got dates for my meeting at the cable channel, cleared one with my boss, and am now just awaiting confirmation. Now I just need to get a confirmation from them, and I'm all set for a week and a half from now.

Fingers crossed it goes well.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Three Years

It was exactly three years ago today that I woke up in Las Vegas, climbed into my best friend's car, and continued our cross country drive. We arrived at the Santa Monica Pier around lunchtime. We'd gone coast to coast: all the way to the Pacific. We ordered a couple hamburgers, then started figuring out where we were going to live.

We moved into our new apartment on Halloween evening, after killing a couple hours by going to see my first movie in the Arclight Dome, Flags of our Fathers. We got into the new apartment, dropped our bags, threw on a couple impromptu costumes and walked down Hollywood Blvd to see the spectacle. We couldn't tell who was in costume, and who was just "like that."

I was totally in over my head, but in a good way. I still want to do now what I wanted to do then, and that's write something that will be remembered, that will entertain people, and hopefully make them think a bit too.

I'm happy with my life right now, and I seem to be making progress. I understand the business much better now, and I'm sure that in another three years I'll understand it on a whole other level.

And now year four begins. If this were college or high school, it'd be senior year. And I seem to recall both senior years being both eventful, fun, and a time to grow. Here's hoping for more of the same.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Boss said I can take the meeting

I spoke with my boss about my meeting. He said as long as I thought it was important that I could take it, just so long as it didn't become an everyday kind of thing, since my job is to help them out, not move my writing career forward. Surprisingly he didn't ask anything about the pilot, or ask me to print him out a copy.

Now I'm just waiting to hear back from my friend about when to have the meeting. I'm looking forward to it, because it's the first time I've really been acknowledged as a writer in this town, not just an assistant who is good with story or an assistant who writes on the side.

I know what the odds are about getting something set up, or getting staffed. But I also know that as long as I'm good and keep working, I'll eventually get there. This meeting request confirms that I'm good enough to be working in this business.

It's somewhat fitting that tomorrow marks my three year anniversary of arriving in LA. There are times when it feels like I'm getting nowhere, but I remember when I arrived thinking that I got where I wanted to be within 5 years I'd be happy. So it looks like I'm on track. I've got a good place to live, some decent industry connections, a girlfriend who's also an aspiring writer and a blast to hang out with. I think I'm in pretty good shape.

Here's hoping the next three years are even better.

P.S. Writress and I scrapped the zombie and zombie hunter Halloween costume idea for something better and nerdier. A little more money than I wanted to spend, but I can recycle the costume bits, and if we every go to Comicon they'll be great. To give you a hint, we're two characters from a favorite TV show, and I'm sometimes known as a "leaf on the wind."

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Good News, and dilemma

I got an email last night from my friend who works at another management company. Apparently his friend who works at a prominent cable channel read and liked my most recent pilot and wants to set a general meeting with me. As you can imagine I'm pretty psyched about this, since that's the first step toward getting the meetings that get you staffed on shows.

Here's the dilemma: She wants to set a morning meeting during the week, probably around 10:30am. This is a problem with my day job, which is at a management company/agency. I haven't really discussed the fact that I'm a writer with my current bosses in detail, though I haven't gone out of my way to hide it. I'm hoping that if I'm straightforward and honest about the situation, which I had not planned on, my bosses will be cool and let me take a morning off for the meeting. While they do represent TV writers, I've heard my boss say on multiple occasions that he doesn't want to take on another hard sell, which is what I am as an untested writer.

I considered faking a doctor's appointment or something, but not only is that sketchier and more dishonest, there's the added issue that if I do eventually get a position on a show at this network, they'll put two and two together and be upset with me that I was dishonest. I think the best way to go about it is to try and have an honest conversation with them. Hopefully it'll all work out.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

This month has flown by

I've been really busy, so this month has gone by pretty quickly. Work is the same. Still plowing ahead on all cylinders for the web series. I think we're ready to cast the male lead now, if not the first five episodes. Next up is writing the next arc (what I'm calling a group of at least 3 webisodes).

Things are going great with the Writress. We geeked out this past week going to see a screening of The Guild and Dr Horrible at the Egyptian theater. A large portion of the Whedon-verse was there, including Joss Whedon himself, so that was a big thrill for me. Interesting note: He still smiles and laughs at his own work. Clearly his first audience is himself, and that's something I can get behind.

We also went to see Nathan Fillion do a Q&A and book signing for CASTLE on monday night. The only bummer was that the jobless people all got there 9 hours in advance, so we didn't get a copy of the book. He was pretty entertaining though, so it was still a worthwhile trip. He's very personable and funny (for example, when he got up to the mic he said in a very hoarse voice, "I'm afraid I've lost my voice" but when he saw the look on everyone's face he said, "Nah, I'm just kiddin" Love that stuff).

My sitcom pilot is coming along as well. Hopefully I'll continue assembling a good portfolio. And if I'm really lucky that will help me get some representation, which is the first big hurdle to making it in this business.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Dumb expressions

It hasn't rained in months, and frankly, LA is getting to be a bit funky. There's so much crap in the air that just parking your car outside for a day leaves it covered in a layer of dirt. I cut through a back alley as a shortcut to the post office everyday for work, and I'm noticing that the alley is smelling progressively worse. It needs to rain, and soon, to clean the city off a bit.

That got me thinking of the expression, "Save a little money for a rainy day." When it rains, I stay inside. I relax and watch a movie, and eat whatever food I have in the house. I don't go out, so I don't spend any money. If anything, I spend LESS on a rainy day. I should be saving my money for beautiful days where I will go out into the world and enjoy life while purchasing tasty food.

One could counter that when it rains you might hang out on the computer and buy crap off Amazon, but that expression is older than the internet, by a lot.

The expression should be, "Save your money on a rainy day" or something to that effect.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Zombieland was awesome

The Cartoon Network exec passed on my pilot because it was too serialized, but I'm okay with it. I still feel very good about that being a strong sample, so I'll keep that on file and keep plugging away at the next projects.

Worked on the webseries a lot on Saturday, and it's coming together. I'm pretty excited about it. After we were done working we came back to Hollywood and saw ZOMBIELAND in Grauman's Chinese Theater (an awesome place to see it for many reasons, some you'll understand after watching it).

I loved that movie so f-ing much. I was so giddy and happy during it that Writress was almost as entertained by my joy as she was at the movie. Fantastic script, brilliant performances, and just a fantastic blast of a fun time in the theater. Clearly Ruben Fleischer knew (despite being a first time director) that making a movie is supposed to be fun. I liked it so much that I set a reminder on Amazon to email me when it becomes available on DVD.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Didn't get into the WB Workshop

I shouldn't be surprised, since pretty much every aspiring writer in town applies to that workshop. And by "aspiring" I'm including people who have been out here working in the industry for over a decade without catching a break. The bummer part of it was that my roommate emailed me to let me know that I had some mail from Warner Bros Television, thinking it would "brighten my day."

Instead, that just got me thinking about the letter for the last few hours I was at work. I was 95% sure it was a rejection, but when you move across the country to make your dreams come true that 5% optimism makes itself heard. So there was a lot of build up to the eventual letdown when I got home.

This morning I finished the rough draft of the first four episodes of my new webseries, and found out that an exec at Cartoon Network is planning on reading my pilot script this weekend, so here's keeping fingers crossed that this weekend is a good time for people to like my work.

In other news, I'm going to see Zombieland tomorrow night, and I'm kinda psyched for it.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My Hulu queue is trying to kill me

New shows have started up again, and I'm psyched about that. But there are a lot of them. Frankly, I find myself looking forward to when more networks abandon the fall-spring season model and space shows out, I'll have enough time to watch everything.

I want to write TV, and I work at a company that covers TV, so it's my job to stay current on what's out there. And despite my great TV knowledge, there are tons of shows I haven't seen yet. Between work and my writing projects, I don't really have enough time to watch all the new stuff, let alone older things like seasons of Stargate SG1 that pile up in there.

Luckily the Writress is a TV-holic as well, and we're able to spend evenings watching stuff together, by even still, it's rough.

Some shows might get canceled, or I'll stop bothering to follow them (despite the collective love-fest it's getting from everyone, I've stopped bothering to follow GLEE for example). Other shows are getting bad ratings despite the fact that everyone I know watches them (for example, DOLLHOUSE). Other shows will never be canceled even though I don't know a single person who DOES watch them (i.e. CSI, NCIS, Two and a Half Men, Ghost Whisperer, etc...).

I need a couple weekends with nothing to do but write and watch tv shows. Or better yet, sell a script and have enough money to quit my day job and stay at home to write and catch up on shows and video games in between meetings with people who might staff me on their shows/hire me to write a feature. A man can dream.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Crazy busy

Every night this week I've been busy. I guess that comes from trying to write a pilot with my girlfriend, write another one through my alumni network, and create a webseries all at the same time.

And to top it all off, shows are starting again. My Hulu queue is like 50 episodes long. Since I'm not unemployed anymore things like additional seasons of stagate SG1 show up and I don't have time to watch them. I fit in Daily Show and Colbert Report before work in the morning, but at night there just isn't enough time to watch the 2 hour HEROES premiere. If I had Hiro's ability to stop time, I wouldn't be saving the world. I'd just use it to get shit done with enough time to sleep.

This weekend I'm taking the Writress to Disneyland for her birthday. It should be fun, but it means I have one less day to get all my weekend stuff done, which I'm sure will include script coverage for work, script work for the webseries, script work for my pilot, and trying to catch up on the week's premieres (by the way, saw the premiere of CASTLE last night. It was nice being able to watch it on Hulu instead of ABC's buggy player. It was a good episode with the exception of Beckett's weird Moscovite accent).

Thursday, September 17, 2009


I don't know why, but I've been tired all week. I'll be going strong then hit a wall at 10:40ish and practically pass out on my feet. This morning I got up and was still tired even before I left for work.

Today may be a long day.

Did good work on the webseries last night, but may need to take a break from writing tonight to lie in bed and watch Mad Men and sleep.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Unconcious Structure

When I first learned about dramatic structure, I expected it to be like learning how an engine runs. They'd open the hood, I wouldn't know what was what, and eventually I'd learn the voodoo that makes this thing run.

What actually happened was I realize, "huh, that makes a lot of sense." I went back and looked at a script I had been writing, thinking I'd need to restructure it, and found that the structure was already in place. I guess from all the countless hours of TV and movies I've watched in my life I learned how an episode is supposed to go. This made me feel good about my potential as a writer.

Last night I started outlining my web series. I had planned on various story arcs, with each arc broken up into parts, sort of like what Felicia Day does with The Guild. I had two story arcs to outline last night, and I found as I wrote them that they naturally broke into three parts each. This is good I think, because in the even that we ever want to turn this into a half-hour comedy, we already have the proper act breaks.

This is all still very much in the planning stages, and I have no clue how/when we're going to shoot any of it, but my friend and I are both very enthusiastic about it so I can't wait to give you more updates.

Stay tuned.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Being responsible

My roommate invited me to go see a movie today. Except he invited me via text message and email. Along with 9 other people. It seems I make the cut when he's inviting all his friends in LA, but not when it's just us hanging out in our apartment together.

It's a movie I didn't really want to see, and I have some work to do, so I'm not going. I have to read and write up notes on two pilot scripts my boss's clients wrote, so rather than rush through it to make a movie I'm staying home so I can do a more thorough job of it. Plus I want to work on my web series idea later tonight.

So I'm being responsible. Part of me misses hanging out with my friend and wants to take what I can get, but honestly, I don't think I should feel bad for this. When he claims he can't spare a single moment in a month in a half I shouldn't be available at any random time he decides he wants to get people together to see a movie.

If he reaches out to me with something more personal than a group evite, then I'll consider working my schedule around so we can hang out.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Found a new project idea

I had drinks with an old friend from Harvard who just got out of grad school and came to LA to act. We came up with a great idea for a webseries to do together, and we're both really psyched and motivated to get started on it.

I haven't written anything I KNEW would get shot since my college TV show, and I remember it being a really good feeling. The hardest part about motivating myself to write out here has been knowing that even if I write a really good episode I'll be begging people to read it.

Stay tuned for more updates.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Next project

A couple months ago I had an idea for another pilot. I put together a beat sheet for it, but have since kinda turned off on the idea. I realized it was very derivative of a game my old roommate liked to talk about, and that kind of took the wind out of my sails on that one.

I'm also in the process of working on a script with Writress, but that's still in the beat sheet phase. We need to find some time to work on it in between catching up on the end of BSG (2 discs left in the series for me) and HIMYM (just finished Season 2 last night).

It's a long weekend this weekend, and Writress will be busy for most of it at an event with some of her old college friends, so I think I want to take at least some of the time to begin working on a new project on my own.

So here's what I'm considering: either another pilot, or to try writing another feature.

I had a feature RomCom idea back a couple months ago, but I've since cooled on that idea too. It wasn't big enough, it didn't keep me excited. Things in the Sci-fi/fantasy genre tend to do that for me more, and I've seemed to start carving a niche out for myself there, so maybe I'll do something like that.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Not sure why I'm interested

Saw this in Wired today, and felt compelled to follow the directions:

It's a simple to make paper airplane that works really well. I kind of dig it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Fool's errand

Some guy just cold called my office asking if we had any positions open. When I said no, he asked for an email to send a resume anyway. I told him I didn't foresee us hiring anyone anytime soon. What it really came down to was that in order for this guy to get a job, I would have to be fired. So asking to send ME your resume won't help you at all.

Plus, cold calling people in this town almost never helps for ANYTHING, but that doesn't stop a zillion random people from calling me everyday asking if they can submit their screenplays. Seriously people, stop trying to break into screenwriting from Oak Ridge NJ, or St. Claire Missouri. As if they'll call and say "Hi, I have a script" and we'll respond, "Really!?? We were JUST saying how we needed to find another one of those. Can you send it to us immediately? Do you mind if we just pay you $1 million in advance for it now? We'll send you more after you win your Oscar for Best Original Screenplay."

The people answering these calls are broke assistants who could be making more money elsewhere but had the guts to actually move to LA and do this, not phone it in half assed from across the country. I'm really happy for you that you got your 14 day free trial to IMDbPro, but for now, shut up.

Monday, August 31, 2009

So hot...

It's been 100 degrees here every day for the past week. When my activities include helping move TV's that weigh more than I do and hanging out in apartments with no air conditioning, it's not very fun.

The worst part has to be the insomnia when it's too hot. I woke up at 3:47 this morning, wasn't able to fall back asleep. Writress was sleeping over, so I went into the other room with my book for a couple hours. At around 6 I got tired enough that I was able to fall back into bed and fall asleep, unfortunately my alarm was set to go off at 6:30. Having to wake up really is the worst part of any job.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Fun with self-medication

I think a spider or something bit me overnight because yesterday and today one of my eyelids has been a bit puffy. I decided this morning to do something about it.

I took some Benadryl, but historically that stuff conks me right out, and I didn't have the luxury of napping all morning since I have to be at work. Nor did I want to just take it and try driving etc...

So instead, I got a big cup of black coffee, drank it, then took a Benadryl to try and counteract the swelling. Since I've weaned myself off needing coffee everyday, it actually has an effect.

So far it's been about 45 minutes and there's been no sleepiness. There is the caffeine rush however. My hands feel slightly shakey, and I think I'm speaking even faster than normal (and if you ever heard me speak, you'd know that I normally speak way too fast anyway, so faster than normal is like the dude from those old Micromachines commercials).

And with that, back to work. I get off an hour early tonight since I came in an hour early on Monday, and I'm gonna go see The Hurt Locker on the Paramount Lot with Writress, so I'm pretty psyched.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Craigslist is always a wild goose chase

I don't like to use craigslist or ebay when looking for stuff. I'll buy the cheap IKEA shelf and put it together my self. It's not worth the hassle to deal with random people for their shit sometimes.

Tonight, Writress's roommate found a big tv for cheap on craigslist. It was also the heaviest thing i've ever tried to carry. We need to go back with a dolly tomorrow to get it down like 5 flights of stairs and into a truck.

Every time I get dragged along to help a friend with craigslist stuff it's always a mess, or some kind of wild goose chase, and it almost never feels worth it.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Had a chance to vent

I had a chance to briefly talk to my other best friend for the past 10 years about this weirdness between me and my roommate/best friend. It was good to talk to someone who understood what was going on, who could confirm that these things I was describing were in fact strange.

Basically I need to find some time to sit down with my roommate and figure out what the hell is going on. Of course that brings up the problem that he never seems to have time when I'm around, but hopefully I can work around that.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

A little pissed off

I'm a little pissed off at my roommate. More and more I'm realizing that he's treating me like some random roommate off of craigslist rather than someone who was supposedly one of his best friends for the last ten years. I can't think of anything I did that would make him act like this. It's all going unsaid, and frankly, is really getting on my nerves.

My sister wants to move to LA after she graduates from college this spring. I've started thinking more and more how much I'll prefer getting a place with her over this situation. As nice as this apartment is, I get pissed when somebody I thought of as family treats me like I'm a fucking stranger.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Chilling myself out

Starting today I have some new responsibilities at work. It's nothing I can't handle, but there are several things to keep track of at once, and I don't really have the option of asking for help if I have any questions or am in need of any clarifications. So what I'm doing for myself is making sure I chill the fuck out.

When I let things pile up all at once, that's when I get over-flustered and screw things up. I'm trying to relax, do one thing at a time, and hopefully all will be good.

Hopefully I'll find more time to write this weekend. Other than a party for my tracking board on Saturday night I don't have much else to do besides kick back and mow through my hulu/netflix queues.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Encouraging email

I recently finished a draft of a new pilot. Last night I registered it with the WGA, and sent it to a few people I'd been in contact with before. I expected not to get any responses for at least a week or so, if at all. Imagine my surprise when this morning I got an email back from a writer/producer on one of my favorite network shows (it's a big one, you know it unless you've been living on a desert island for the last 5 years, which would be ironic). She said she really liked it, had a couple small suggestions, and offered encouragement. Pretty much, it was as positive as she could be short of offering me a job, which I doubt she's empowered to do anyway.

It just helps to have validation from people who really know what they're talking about. I'm almost done with the pilot I was working on with my roommate. He hasn't had time to work on it really at all the past few months. It's just not a priority for him. So with his blessing I'm going to try to finish it this weekend on my own. Once I do that, I'll have two strong original pilot samples, and a Heroes spec I can use as part of a writing portfolio along with the feature script I wrote before moving to LA.

I also broke story the other night on a sci-fi pilot I'm working on with the Writress. That one will be really freaking cool, and I'm looking forward to the next steps on that.

In other news, the new job is going alright so far. There seems to be a nice solid break between when i'm at work and when I'm not, which is a welcome change from my previous job where spoiled trust fund babies thought that every moment of my life should be forfeit to them because they were "producers" despite the fact that they showed me no loyalty and did nothing to help me further my career. Considering that I was working less than minimum wage if I added up all the hours a week I was putting in for that job, that's really shitty of them. Now I have the time and energy to keep writing on the side, which I feel I can do now that I'm in a position to actually do something with my writing rather than just hone my craft.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

New Job

I got a new job. Yeah, finally, I know.

I wasn't quite sure I was going to get it when I went in for the second interview, nor was I sure that I even wanted it if I did get it. But it seems to be working out alright so far. It's not my dream job, but the past four months have just taught me that my dream job ain't hiring.

So I can keep this up while writing specs, and remember that I came out here to be a writer. I won't be distracted from that by faux creative opportunities like my last job where I did my bosses' jobs for them and didn't get paid for it.

These people seem like good employers, so we'll see how it goes. For now, expect fewer updates between 9am and 7pm, unless they come during my lunch break from my crackberry.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Away we go

Just saw Sam Mendes' Away We Go last night at a free screening on the Paramount Lot (Thanks Writress). It's the story of a couple in search of a new home in anticipation of their first child being born. As they travel around the country, there are great cameos throughout by people like Allison Janney, Jim Gaffigan, and Maggie Gyllenhaal.

It was interesting because it showed new and different ways for people to be terrible parents in film. We're beyond the days of distant 1950's fathers who are never around, or the overbearingly strict parents. These were bad hippie parents who don't believe in things like Strollers and breast feed their kids past the point when they're talking.

I'm sure that there were weird parents during the 70's and 80's too. They just weren't on my radar as much. Plus I find myself watching these kinds of stories now and identifying more with the parents than the kids, which is something I'm still a bit freaked by. I mean, I'm someone who likes to act childish from time to time, so it's strange for me when I find myself not getting what kids are doing.

After the movie Writress and I took her mom to a crepe place in Hollywood that was really good. There was a family sitting at another table, and one toddler kid was roaming around exploring the restaurant. His mother was keeping a close eye on him but letting him explore, and I found that I couldn't help but be concerned for the kid. All I could see were the various ways he could smack his head or something.

It made me wonder if when I eventually have kids I'll be that crazy constantly worrying parent instead of the silly and fun parent I always assumed I'd be someday.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Lots of books

I just got a shipment from UPS of six boxes full of books from my parents. For the most part they're ones from college that I never had a chance to bring out here. I now have stacks of books throughout my room and I'm in desperate need of some bookshelves. May have to hit IKEA soon.

It's nice though. Having most of my education on display reminds me that I did actually accomplish something in college and that I'm qualified to to a lot of things despite the fact that I'm struggling to get a job answering someone's phone right now.

Now I just need to find the time to read the books I never finished, and to read some that I never even got a chance to start. Maybe I'll be able to trick my book club into picking one of those.

I also want to look through some of my old anthologies of early American and British literature. Something in there might work great for a modern adaptation.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Still waiting

I'm still waiting for a lot of things.

The first is any word on this Office P.A. job I interviewed for a couple weeks ago. They said that they'd be able to get back to me around the 15th, so I'm hoping I hear something soon, preferably that I got the job. I think I'd be good at it, and I really want it. It just sucks that I may not get a shot because I'm not the nephew of some studio exec.

I'm also waiting on notes from the other people in my writer's group. I've given them notes, and two sessions in a row I've been left with nothing but half assed notes from one person almost a week late. I'm trying to hone this thing because I want to send it to some people who asked about it, including a LOST writer and people who work at two different management companies. This is the first big thing I've written entirely by myself that wasn't a spec of an existing show for a while, so I want it to be the best it can be. I don't expect much from it beyond working as a writing sample, but who knows, I could get lucky and someone at SyFy (still not a great network name) could be interested in it.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Back in LA

Back in LA now after a nice trip back east. I mailed out my WB program application today, so hopefully that will arrive by tomorrow. And then the waiting begins.

Probably what will happen is I'll just forget. If I hear something, I'm sure it will be a surprise. More likely I won't hear anything this time, and I'll just have to reapply next year.

In the meantime I need to write up notes for the other people in my spec pilot writing group, revise my own script, and get cracking on the outline for my new pilot.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

"Apply Online" should let you apply online

The Warner Bros TV Writer's Workshop is taking submissions for their 2009 program this month. Since it's the only one that isn't a "Diversity Program" it's also pretty much the only one I can apply to since I'm an Ivy League educated white male from the Northeast. It's a great opportunity to grow as a writer and get noticed by people who could hire me as a staff writer on one of their shows, so I really hope I get in. If not, I'll keep applying every year unless I get staffed on my own in the meantime.

Here's the snag though: the application process is proving to be more problematic than it should be. It used to be a mail-only process. A friend of mine at Warners assured me that they were changing it to online submissions this year, which is great since I don't own a printer, and I'm in Massachusetts this week and don't really want to mail a script across the country. This morning I put the final touches on my application letter, and clicked "Apply Now."

It took me through various windows like any online form does. When I came to the "payment" page, which was strangely before any chance for me to upload a script, the only options for payment were check and money order. I had to ask my roommate to look at my checkbook back in LA and give me a check number. I figured it was similar to a "check by phone" situation. I enter the info, and click "Next" to find that I've now submitted my application, and have been brought to a page that says, "Review, Print & Mail In with your Script, Resume, Composition, Payment & Submission Agreement."

Basically, the "Apply Online" function was just a way to fill out the form on the computer before printing it, and then mailing it in just like the old system. And they don't mention this in the form, it just surprises you saying that you need to print. Since I didn't have a printer, I was kind of mad. Luckily I was able to bring my laptop to my family's printer. If this had happened when I was back in LA I would have been screwed.

So Warner Brothers, thank you for continuing your program to help young writers start their careers, but please don't say that you can apply online when the process still involves printing 60 pages and driving to the post office.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Why I love airport bars

I reflected on this again earlier tonight after a random and fun conversation waiting in the Virgin America terminal for a flight back to the east coast.

Here's why airport bars are great. Most people are traveling alone, have nowhere else to go, and are bored. Nobody's driving (except the pilots) so there's no reason to stay sober. Everyone has something in common: bitching about various aspects of the travel experience. For all these reasons, you always end up sitting next to random strangers from all walks of life, and having really interesting conversations.

Tonight is a good example. Right now I'm on a plane (with WiFi! Holy Shit we live in the future!), but earlier tonight I was in the Virgin America/Alaska Airlines terminal at LAX. There's only one bar, and when I'm about to get on a redeye, I like to have a beer or two. It was very crowded, so in the search for a place to sit down, I started talking to a woman who was in the same situation. When two bar seats opened up right next to each other, she pointed them out and we sat down next to each other with our bags and started chatting.

She was blonde, with big fake boobs. I was pretty sure she was a stripper or did porn or something, but didn't comment on it. I treated her like any other fellow traveler and kept conversation pretty casual, and didn't even ask any follow up questions whenever she mentioned the "modeling" that she did. We talked about traveling, beer, LA, and her two kids (aged 8 and 9, even though she was about my age).

It was a fun game for me to put together what she did by the context of how she discussed work. For example, she mentioned that she had just been cast as a stripper in a Gerard Butler movie. She mentioned going to a party at the Playboy Mansion, and that she was hoping to get in the magazine.

Her name was Melissa. She discussed how she was having trouble getting her accounts kicked off facebook when she uploaded photos, even though she assured me that "none of them had nudity, or if they did, nipples and stuff were covered up."

Basically, this was someone completely different from me, but very nice. We were very friendly, and yet I wasn't hitting on her (made possible by the Writress shagging me out with regularity I'm sure). It was informative, fun, and a classic LA conversation. It was great.

This is just one of the many random conversations I've had in airport bars. I've seen the range from your regular "i need someone to drink with" guys to a woman who confided in me that she was gay, and it was a big source of tension between her and her mother.

Everyone has a story to tell. It's easy to remember that when you're in an airport.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Continued Job Hunt

I had a pretty good interview earlier this week, but if this current economy has taught me anything, it's that a great interview isn't always enough anymore.

There was time in my life where every job I interviewed for, I got. I suppose it's just harder to seem impressive these days when I'm in my chosen industry alongside hundreds of other people in my shoes applying for the same jobs.

Even when I was applying to Harvard, I'm pretty sure I got in on the strength of an interview I had (I made the admissions lady laugh. I guess I was pretty charming back when I was 18). Now I'm crossing my fingers and following up in what ways I can. I'm hesitant to even write about it here, since talking about something I look forward to has always been the best way to jinx it in my experience.

The bright side of my continued unemployment is that I will be able to go visit my family for a week over the 4th of July this year. Originally I wanted to go back later in the summer when my brother would be there as well, but if I do happen to get a job in the next week or two I don't want to take time off when I'm still new to whatever office it might be. Plus, 4th of July is great on Cape Cod.

Writress started her first job this week, which means we aren't hanging out 24/7 anymore, but since we were like that for pretty much the first 3 weeks of going out, I think it's okay. Things are still going well, and apparently I even got the "we like him" from her parents after meeting her dad. It all feels much more relationshippy than anything has since college, but I think that's because I'm finally ready for that.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Starting a new pilot

So I've finished the first draft of the last pilot I was working on by myself, and I'm nearly done with the one I'm working on with my roommate. Obviously there will be a revision period for both scripts, but in the meantime I've also started on a new project.

Right now all I have is the rough concept, and a sketch of what the pilot episode could be. Which each organizational step I take I come up with new details for the world and connections between the characters. I see it ideally as accomplishing what Heroes was aiming for, bringing that sense of wonder but not needing to follow the Heroes example of having 15 main characters who didn't know each other.

I've set a schedule in my calendar similar to what I used through my writer's group, but on a slightly faster pace. If I'm still unemployed that long (hopefully not) I'll have a draft in about a month and a half.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Roommate tension

Again, I haven't posted much of late. Aside from things still going well with Writress, the only other thing going on is that the temporary roommate has been even more of a pain in the ass of late.

He's been passive-aggressively trying to bait me for weeks now. He acts like I'm intruding on his space anytime I'm not just sitting out of sight in my own bedroom, even when I'm just sitting in the living room in the middle of the day watching something/playing something on the Xbox that I paid for. It acts as the communal DVD player, and a sort of OnDemand machine since I bought a wireless adapter for it, and paid for XboxLive (which I almost never use for online gaming) because that gives us access to our instant Netflix Queue on the TV. He uses the xbox all the time, and honestly has an attitude like I'm encroaching on his space if I momentarily prevent him from being able to sit on the futon that I paid for and watch stuff on it. Basically, he was fine with me living there when I was working and out of the apartment most of the time. When I lost my job and have been home during the day more, he no longer has his way with everything. At least he's only around for another few weeks.

My other roommate, the guy I moved out here with, doesn't want to get stuck in the middle. But frankly, he's not that in the middle. He seems to be mostly on the other guy's side even though he acknowledges that I'm not the awful roommate/person the other guy is trying to make me out to be. Roommate use to be my best friend. I don't know what happened, but over the course of the past year I seem to have been demoted in status, which pisses me off. He's a nice guy, but there just isn't nearly as much loyalty in him as I once thought. He's been boxing me out more and more over the past year, to the point that I feel more like a guy renting a room in his apartment than I feel like his friend. If I didn't live with him, say if I started renting a studio apt by myself (which might actually be cheaper for me anyway) I doubt I'd ever see the guy anymore.

Once the invader is gone in a couple weeks I'm going to sit down with Roommate and have an honest discussion about this. Frankly it's been upseting me more than it should. And if he really hasn't noticed anything wrong with how things have been going the past year I'd be surprised.

At least I have Writress to kick around with now. It's been about a month since we met and she's still great. I even told my family about her, which isn't something I've done about girls I've dated since CollegeEx (definitely didn't tell the folks about MissCrazy). I see this going for a long time, and it's good. I remember when I first moved out here thinking that the kind of girl I'd end up with would be another tv writer. I don't think other people understand it. She's kind of the girl I've been waiting to meet since I realized I wanted to do this with my llife.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Met the new girl's Dad last night

So I have a new girlfriend, and she's the reason I haven't been posting on here very much in the past couple weeks. She's also trying to be a TV writer out here, but unlike me she just recently moved here. While we both job hunt, we have tons of free time so we hang out like two broke people together and watch a lot of DVD's. It's a good time.

We've also taken some time to sit down and write together (on separate projects) which means we aren't even slacking off all that much. I've decided her blog nickname should be the Writress.

So Writress's dad was in town on business last night. The two of them went out for dinner together, but I met up with them for dessert, which was good. Afterward she claimed that he liked me, so I guess I did alright. I hadn't met the father of a girl I was dating since my college ex, and I met her parents when we were only 18. So it's been a while (i.e. seven years) since I've been in the hot seat like that. Good to know I came off okay.

I haven't told my parents about her yet, but I think I will soon. This isn't something I did with MissCrazy over the six months we dated, and I also never mentioned the last significant relationship to my parents (this was a summer thing that became more serious, especially for her, a couple years ago. Sidebar: that girl just moved back to LA and has been texting and facebook wall posting me. Perhaps drama will ensue, I'll keep you posted).

I just feel very comfortable and at ease with this girl, and I think I'm in a place where I could allow myself to get serious with someone again. When I broke up with the college ex senior year I did not expect to go this long without taking anything seriously, but in retrospect I should have. I just didn't want to be in the position to break someone's heart the way I broke her's for a while.

Do I see a future with the Writress? Hard to tell since we've only been dating for a couple weeks. However, it has been a very good couple weeks, and we have a lot in common and both seem to want the same thing out of life. For now things are relaxed and at ease, but I can still tell that she really likes me without needing weird drama from her end to confirm it.

So far, so good.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Things are still pretty good

So that great first date lead to great hanging out every day this past week. It's been a good time. No drama, and we have a ton in common. She's new to LA and looking for her first industry job, so since I'm unemployed at the moment we're able to just hang out and be cheap together. Mostly watching lots of TV show DVD's, though we have also taken some time to write (on separate projects, no collaborations yet) which has been good and productive.

There's been no official discussion of girlfriend status as of yet, but things are pretty much looking like that.

More postings to follow.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Great first date

I just had the best first date I've had in years. We got along great. We had fun together. I like her a lot and she seems to be crazy about me too. We're hanging out first thing tomorrow morning again.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Coffee as a writing aid

There are some writers who think stimulants help you write better. I've heard stories about guys like Aaron Sorkin taking drugs so they can keep writing all night. Looking at the number of West Wing scripts he churned out himself over the course of a season, it kind of makes sense.

I recently watched an interview with Stephen King when he spoke with some candor about it, saying that in the short term it did help. To quote him, 'They call it Bolivian Marching Powder for a reason." He then went on to describe how much it screwed him up when he became dependent on it. Apparently he doesn't even remember writing Cujo, he was that doped up.

So even if I could afford to get a few grams of cocaine before a writing session, I wouldn't want to. However, there is a more PG version, and that's coffee.

There was a coffee maker at my old office, and I drank too much every day, and got dependent on it. I weaned myself off, and felt better for it. Now I don't drink coffee with any regularity, so when I have even one cup I feel the effects.

I have a lot of writing to get done today, and I haven't been productive this week. So today I used my coffee maker for the first time in at least a couple months to make a couple cups of Dunkin' Donuts Dark Roast. And it helped. I have energy, and I just finished the first pass of Act Two of my spec script.

I think the trick is to keep using coffee sparingly. If I tried to do this every day it would stop working. And get expensive.

For now, I'm going to take a short break, get some food, and go get my car washed in preparation for tomorrow (and because there is just months of LA on my car). Then I'll come back and work on Act Three.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Was not productive today

I meant to get a lot more done today than I did.

The Office is partly to blame. We have a house guest mowing through the seasons of it, and I'd never seen most of it before, so I find myself watching with her.

And I was out late last night, got up late this morning, and waited until mid-afternoon to shower and change out of pajamas. I've decided that even though I'm writing and working from my desk in my bedroom, I'm still more productive if I get up like I'm actually working in the morning, shower, and change into regular clothing.

I went to a TV writer's thing on Wed night, and there was actually another one scheduled tonight. The official starting time is 10pm, and it's 10:23 right now. Technically I could leave right now and still be on the early side of things. But really, I don't want to go spend more money at any bars tonight, and I don't want to stay out late like I know I will if I go.

I met a girl at the Wed night one that I'm seeing on Monday. I talked to her yesterday and she said there was a chance she'd be at the thing tonight, but I don't think it would be worth the hassle to head over there if she was only going to show up at the end. Plus I don't want to go too out of my way to see her. We have an afternoon date planned for Monday, I can wait until then, and honestly, it will probably mean a more productive day for me tomorrow.

I think I'll even set my alarm. I've been sleeping in for weeks. I'm going to try and nip some of these slacker tendencies in the bud. Plus, if I finish the work I need to do on my spec tomorrow I can take even more time for Monday if I want. Ironically, I can even call my date on Monday research, since I'm writing a feature script featuring the place we're planning on going as a first date spot. It might be a bit of life imitating art, but with the art being revised based on the life part.

But really, based on the night we met I kind of like this girl, so I want things to go well. I always get excited about first dates. I'm an optimist about how things will turn out I guess. But even taking that into account, I have a good feeling about this girl. Knock on wood, keep your fingers crossed.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Met with some writers last night

Last night I went to a get together of other aspiring TV writers here in Hollywood. Technically it's for aspiring and current, but in our small group everyone was aspiring.

That being said, it was still a really nice night. Sure nobody there was in the position to give me a job, but they were all nice people and I liked talking to them. We all seemed to be on the same page about various TV shows and I liked it.

There was also a young woman there who just recently made her move out to LA to follow the same path I've been on. We had a really nice talk, and made plans to hang out again soon. I don't want to get into more detail than that, because I've been having a weird string of luck regarding first and second dates recently. I actually like this girl, and so I don't want to do anything to jinx it until I have a clearer idea of whether we'd get along or not.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

My Saturday night just imploded.

I had plans for tonight, and they just fell through at the last minute. Since I'm so broke as to worry about things like quickly approaching IRS payments and rent, this isn't one of those nights where I feel up to just going out into Hollywood on my own. Instead I'm just sitting around my bedroom, listening to music I bought when I was 10 and looking at too much Twitter and Facebook, pondering things like the fact that in my life I've already had more than one girl say she loved me and mean it. And how maybe I've taken that kind of thing for granted more than I should.

I guess I've always had this assumption that when I'm finally ready to settle down I'll find another girl that I love who will love me back, since it seemed so easy before.

I think it's just the combination of being unemployed, broke, and single is starting to get to me a little. Maybe I'll use some of tonight to write, that might help me feel a little more like I'm on the path to something other than being forced to move back east and teach screenwriting to people who will never have the balls to move to LA.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Dollhouse gets picked up!

This is very good news. The show started off weak. I'll admit it. It was still a well written show and a great concept, but the original pilot script was much better than what ended up airing for the first episode. I think there were too many people "helping" by making all the notes about new and exciting ways to look at Eliza Dushku's ass. And while like many other warm blooded men I am a fan of Eliza Dushku's ass, I can see it in some copy of Maxim if I want. On TV, I want to see her in a real story.

The second half of the first season got good. I mean really good. You could tell they stopped trying to make interchangeable episodes about brainwashed hookers and started making a real drama with in depth characters (even the ones who had their minds wiped every other day) and some really entertaining stuff.

It's not as good as Firefly. That show should have been on for at least 5 seasons, and it would have been fantastic. But I think Dollhouse will still be able to surprise us now that they've been given a chance to really prove themselves.

I'm also celebrating this as a victory because it means somebody finally worked through their inbox and saw the DVR and online view numbers instead of just looking at the obsolete Nielson ratings.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

So damn broke

I've been out of the job for a month and a half now. Which means I've had to pay rent for April and May already, which pretty much ate through my savings. June 1st is rapidly approaching, which is bad enough, but I also got word back from the IRS that I owe an amount close to one month's rent. Basically my taxes were all screwy because my old bosses were lazy and didn't pay us through a payroll company for 6 months, so half of my income was totally fine with my W2, the other half wasn't, and when I tried to reconcile that I must have done something wrong.


I filed for unemployment, which I didn't do last time I was unemployed, but so far all I've gotten is a couple hundred bucks. I see a flaw in the system. If the point of it is to insure that people can stay afloat while hunting for a new job, why does it take a month to get such a small amount? If I were living completely paycheck to paycheck before this happened I'd have been this screwed a month ago and the small amount I've received wouldn't have done much.

I understand it's tough, and that I'm basically getting free money from a state that's going bankrupt, but I can't help but point out the discrepancy between the goal of the program and it's actual execution.

And the thing is, it's not even like I'm failing at the job search. I just had a second interview Monday night, sent them writing samples on Tuesday, and just received word today that they want to have a follow up phone call with me. Even if I don't get the job, I'm doing what I'm supposed to.

Being unemployed sucks. Our generation has basically been put in the position that unless we sell out and go for something that pays us a ridiculous amount of money (and even that can backfire, just look at anyone you know who became an investment banker after college) there's no way to support yourself without going into crippling debt. Fix the damn economy people, I'd like to not think of a burrito as an extravagant expense.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Old CD's

I finally got around to importing all my old CD's into iTunes, and man, I'd forgotten I had some of this stuff. I'm talking random things I haven't even thought about since the 90's like Soundgarden.

Since I have a 6 disc changer in the trunk of my car I never get around to changing what CD's are in there for months at a time. The only things I had on my computer for the most part were random songs I had downloaded during college when people still used the original Napster.

This is good though, I'll finally listen to some of the stuff I own again. Now all I have to do is break down and finally buy an iPod or something (I'm one of the last people I know who's never broken down and bought one).

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Why am I Cougar-bait?

The past year, every girl that's flirted with me seems to be at least a year or two older. This is perplexing to me.

Technically they're not Cougars, and really, there's not much of a difference between age 27 and age 25 in LA, but it's still a strange pattern. Is it because I seem mature, or because I seem immature and they're trying to reclaim their youth?

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Why is it...

...that all the most fantastic girls are practically married to some guy they've been dating for six years? And it's not the silly romantic comedy thing where the guy is a douchebag and the chick must be saved from making a big mistake with him. If she's cool, chances are he is too and if I knew him I'd want to be his friend.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

MissCrazy drunk emailed me

MissCrazy sent me an email around 1am last night saying, "I'm a little drunk and will regret this in the morning. I miss you."

I still haven't responded. I'm not sure if I should or if she even wants me to.

My best bet is that she was out last night, got a little drunk/horny, felt a little lonely, and remembered that we had fun together. I get it. When you're alone, even a person who's not right for you is better than nobody at all.

I want to be a nice guy and find the right thing to say back to her, but to what end? I don't want to get back together with her. I don't want to hook up "one last time", even if that statement wasn't total bullshit (there's no such thing as one last time).

I'm broke, unemployed, alone, and trying to be a freaking writer in Hollywood. Saying it like that sounds kind of depressing. I don't need to add some girl drama to that mix.

Still, I feel like I'd be an asshole if I didn't say anything to her.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Noticed an Earthquake!

We just had a little earthquake here in L.A. Registered 4.4 on the Richter scale, centered in Westlake Village. I actually noticed it this time.

I was sitting in bed watching this week's scrubs, and it felt like my bed was shaking for a few seconds. When nobody else noticed it I almost convinced myself it was just a really big truck driving by on Highland Ave (right outside my window), but then people on facebook and twitter also commented. Thank you social networking.

This makes me kinda happy because I've somehow missed all the other ones since I moved here two and a half years ago, even the notable one we had last summer.

I almost feel like I have some more authority as an Angeleno now, as lame as that sounds.

Strange Dreams

Since I'm finally getting enough sleep for the first time in a while, I'm remembering my dreams again. Not all of them, just the really vivid ones from right before I wake up. And even those fade pretty quickly.

The other night, there was something about how someone had messed something up, and three nukes were going to go off. The only thing I remember clearly is that it was exactly three bombs, and when they went off I was laying on the ground, with my head turned away from the explosion. That's kind of a messed up dream.

Last night, I had a dream that I was acting in something with a really pretty girl, who seemed like someone I felt like I had gone to school with or something, but upon later reflection seemed to look like the actress from Legend of the Seeker. I met up with my best friend from high school and the two of us went to some park. There we went off on our separate ways, and I sat on this ridge looking down at the park to where they were doing some blasting for construction. The girl I was acting with came over and sat with me. She jokingly sat in my lap, and asked how I felt about her. I said that my character was in love with her character. She got up to walk away. I then finished my statement with, "but I think you're pretty swell too." She smiled, and kissed me.

Then I woke up.

I don't interpret dreams. I have no idea what that one means. I'll probably remember it for a while now that I've written it down.

The reason I bring it up is this: Does that ever happen to you when you start to hook up with someone in a dream, but you wake up before things get really good? Then you try to go back to sleep and pick up where you left off, but you can't.

I can't remember that many of the details, but I remember how I felt about this girl in my dream. I was really into her. And having her like me too, laughing and sitting with me on the grass in that park, felt really good. I'm less upset that I didn't get laid in the dream and more upset that I didn't get to have that feeling longer. Because if felt like falling in love, which is something I haven't felt in a really long time. long enough that I think I was starting to forget what it felt like, since my only frame of reference in recent years has been getting to know a girl I kind of like, not falling head over heels about someone.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Haven't had as much to blog about recently

I've been spending my days sending out resumes when I see promising jobs, and spending most of the rest of my time watching various tv shows on Hulu.

It's nice, but I am starting to get a bit restless. I'm writing more, finishing up the outline for my spec pilot, writing the first draft of another with my roommate, and I've begun outlining my first full feature script.

I had other features that I attempted, that exist at various stages. One I even started writing. It was based on a trip I took to Indiana to visit my then-girlfriend's family one summer. Really I think it was just a means to deal with some of that stuff. It wouldn't have been a great script, so I'm glad I stopped myself as early as I did, since it did not have a very strong outline either. And I have other concepts that I considered writing that I have shelved, but may very well brush off someday and work on again.

This one I'm working on now is a romantic comedy, but not a chick-flick. Chickflick is definitely a subset of romantic comedy to be sure, but while most people think the two terms are interchangeable, they are not. Some of the best, such as "When Harry met Sally" or even the more recent "Knocked Up" have a lot of heart and romance to them, but they are not just chick movies.

Chickflicks are romantic comedies that don't get the real focus of what the story should be. It's about TWO people coming together, much like people do in real life. Chickflicks always have some kind of unrealistically written male who's just there to have a great smile and look good with his shirt off, so the rest of the story can dazzle their audience with the woman's perspective on everything from wedding day jitters to that bitch who's wearing the same shoes.

I know how hard costume people and production designers work. To be honest, they don't get nearly enough praise. But when the entire point of the movie is the costuming and the production design, that's not a movie. That's a fashion show that tries to tell a story.

So in short, yes, I am writing a romantic comedy. Does this mean I'll stop writing action and science fiction and comedy? No. Even if I tried to I wouldn't be able to, because those kinds of ideas pop up in my mind all the time. They're genres that I love.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Dealing with the success of others

Sometimes I have trouble dealing with other people's success. I think it comes down to this: I haven't accomplished what I came out to LA to do yet. Right now, I'm still unemployed (had a promising interview, but then the lazy dumbasses at my old job took my asking for a recommendation call every day for three days as "let's wait the better part of a week and write a half assed email").

I know how hard it is to succeed, especially trying to be a writer in Hollywood. I have this sense that I can't accept anyone else (especially someone younger than me) being good at this, because it leaves less room for me to succeed.

I sit here, unemployed, having spent the better part of this month just sitting around watching tv shows on Hulu. Yeah, I'm learning more about scripted dramatic TV, but really I've just gotten myself into a rut. I was great when I first got fired. I was all over sending resumes, following up with people. Then to be honest, in trying to see the bright side I got to really like staying home and relaxing like a lazy ass every day. I can't keep it up forever, but I certainly can for a month.

It's really hard out there to find the jobs that I need to get me to where I want to go. Nobody who can help you really wants to. So today, I'm getting off my ass a little more. I'm writing a treatment for a feature script, something I haven't done for a while, but think it's time to do. It'll be a sweet, saleable romantic comedy, but written more from the Knocked Up tone and dude perspective than these chick flick movies. I need something to really work on so I can feel like I'm not just being useless. And I need to have more finished projects so I can feel better about myself when saying that I'm a writer.

Ideally, in a few months I'll have finished my original spec pilot, the other pilot I'm writing with my roommate, and this script. Add that to my other feature script, my spec Heroes episode, my experience on my college TV show, and the unused college show pilot I think I'll fix up, I will have a decent amount of samples and can really pursue getting representation and work.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Had a fun night

Tonight was the slightly belated birthday gathering of a friend of mine who was a couple years behind me in college. It was nice to go out to a fun bar I'd never been to before, to meet some new people, and even catch up with an old friend from high school who happens to work with her.

I joked with my old friend that she should be my female wingman, partly for fun, and partly because I had already found a friend of hers to be attractive. So after talking with her friend a bit, I was able to take my new wingman aside and say that I thought her friend was cute. I'm pretty sure she put a good word in for me when she went to the bar, because very soon I was talking to her friend again, and got her number.

Strangely enough, this girl has the same first name as NurseLady (who by the way, has still not responded after standing me up on Thursday night). But she seems cooler. And she also went to my college, graduating two years behind me. She is native to SoCal, but she went to a preppy east coast school so that probably balances things out a bit. I got her number, walked her to her car, and made plans to see her again soon.

I contemplated going in for the kiss at her car, but it wasn't quite right. In the long run, it's better than I didn't, since I could see myself actually dating this girl, rather than just trying to get as much ass as possible as quickly as possible.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

NurseLady is half an hour late. Methinks I'm getting stood up.

UPDATE: Yeah, she stood me up. It's now after 10pm, I'm back at home, and still no word from her. Unless she has some excuse like she got stuck assisting in a life saving surgery, I'm annoyed.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Interview went alright

The job interview went pretty well yesterday morning. It was supposed to be Monday, but right after I wrote the blog post that it was in an hour and a half, I got a call from them rescheduling. But the interview seemed to go well. They said, "we like you" as I was leaving and that's always a good sign. I called my old office to get them to put in a good word for me, we'll see if they actually manage to get their shit together enough to do that. It looks like this job is pretty good, and close to the kind of thing I want to be doing. It's not big and corporate, but there are a lot of people there, and they're actually producing movies and TV shows, so that's kind of where I want to be to learn some stuff.

My friends return today. I had texted BestFriend yesterday, and got a response from BestFriendsGirlFriend asking for an airport pickup. Since I'm still technically unemployed I might as well get them. We'll see if they remember to say Happy Birthday now. If they don't I think I have a very reasonable right to be pissed off at the friends of mine who skipped town for a week and forgot my birthday.

My parents, who are kind of awesome, got me a recliner for my birthday. I was hoping it would arrive here at the apartment before my roommates got back, so it would be a little surprise, but the damn thing hasn't gotten here yet even though it's been 9 days. I think I'm going to call the company today to find out what the hell is going on with this. I want my chair.

Turning to my romantic dealings, MissCrazy is officially out, but seems to have moved past the hating me stage. She wanted to take me out for a birthday drink, but the days when we were both out of town prevented that, and honestly that's probably for the best for now. I don't want a friendly drink to become a "let's hook up just one more time" drink, which will inevitably become a "so are we back together now?" drink.

I met a nurse out at a bar after my birthday drinks. Turns out we come from the same area back east, and she seemed nice enough. I gave her my card, and some douchey guy was getting all clingy with her and she left, but then she texted me an hour later saying she wanted to go out and that guy was just a jealous asshole. I'm seeing her tomorrow night so I'll let you know later if we actually get along well or if that was just the whiskey talking the other night.

I do like that I never got her number in the bar, I just gave her my card. Took a lot of pressure off me. Instead of having to jump through all kinds of hoops as the pursuer, I was able to just sit back and let her come to me. And I can tell that she kind of likes me by the way she's pursuing. But there will be an update on NurseLady later. For now, I want to get some breakfast, watch a little TV on Hulu, find out what's up with my chair, and work on this new feature idea I have.
I can now blog from my crackberry. We'll see how this goes.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Job interview today

I have a job interview in an hour and a half. I still have my entire apartment to myself because my roommates all went on a trip together. They left on my birthday, and not a one of them has even sent me a text message saying Happy Birthday. They kind of suck as friends at the moment.

On Friday night I went out with some other friends for birthday drinks. We had a good time, they had to leave, and I stayed out by myself a bit. I went to this place called Beauty Bar in Hollywood where I met Samm Levine from Freaks and Geeks (who had hot chicks all over him even though he's a short nerdy guy, it must be nice being semi-famous) and a nurse from the same place where I grew up.

I gotta say, especially since I find myself having to fend for myself a bit with my friends being so lame, I'm glad I have the social skills to walk into a crowded bar where I know nobody and have fun for a few hours.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Getting the house ready for Grandkids

I'm back in LA now, continuing the job search. But I felt I should comment on what it was like helping my parents move into their new house. It was kind of surreal, because it was honestly like I was setting the place up for my children to visit.

There were all these toys I had used when I was a kid, and since my mom was a neat freak who raised us all to be neat freaks who took care of our stuff, they were all still in great condition. When I eventually have kids, my parents house will become "grandma and grandpa's house" and they'll play with the same blocks as I did over twenty years ago.

I was especially aware of this possibility because this wasn't just them moving. They had designed that house to be the one they live in for the rest of their lives. They planned on everything. The master bathroom tub has a shower thingy in it so they can bathe grandkids.

It's not like my parents are impatiently waiting for me to knock someone up. Quite the opposite actually. It's just that they prepared for the possibility. And since my birthday is tomorrow, I'm aware of how I'm getting older. When I see people with kids on the street, I identify with the parents, not the kids, and that's frightening to me.

Basically, it's the realization that this whole "growing up" thing is for real. Not matter what you do it happens, so chances are I'll be moving onto the next step sooner than I think.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Holy crap do my friends suck

I'm back in Cape Cod with my parents at the moment, moving furniture and at least a hundred boxes filled with books (we're a literate family, which isn't great for my back at the moment). I'm flying back to LA on Tuesday, which happens to be two days before my 25th birthday.

I'm flying back then instead of staying longer with family because I wanted to spend my birthday with my "LA family", i.e. my best friends out there that function as a surrogate family of sorts. It's easter/passover weekend, which makes things trickier, but I'm hoping on a decent enough crowd so I can have a fun night.

A couple good friends of mine who live out in Venice are going to be out of town, that sucks, but I'm not upset about it.

Here's what I am upset about. My roommate, who has been my best friend for almost a decade, is taking off early in the morning on my birthday with his girlfriend to spend easter and the week after that with her family. That sucks, but I could understand. But they're also bringing along our other roommate, the guy who went to college with my best friend and is visiting LA for six months and staying in our loft. So the three people I live with, and consider to be good friends of mine, are ditching me as a unit.

I try not to let this kind of stuff bug me, but it's been building for a while. First my best friend and his girlfriend become inseparable to the point that I feel like I'm a guest in their apartment rather than it being her staying over at our place. I've been in love before, I get how that goes.

But then the best friend's buddy from college comes to stay with us. I'm not even told that he's coming until he's already bought plane tickets from the UK. I figure at least I'll have someone to kick around the apartment with when BestFriend and BestFriendsGirlfriend are off doing whatever together.

But once he arrived, it was like the three of them became a new unit. Stuff continued to happen with me having no idea. I'd come home and propose doing something together and find that they were all on their way out the door to a show.

Basically, it comes down to this, as lame and "1st grade" as it sounds. I feel like I'm not my best friend's best friend anymore. I feel like I barely qualify as "good friend" at this point, and if I moved out of the apartment I'd probably never see the guy.

And that really sucks, and it's lame, but I can't really bitch to friends and family about it, so the blog was here to catch my angry typing.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Anachronistic Blogging whilst traveling

I just took a red eye flight from LAX to Boston, and I'm now hanging out in my little sister's apartment at Boston College. During the trip I blogged old school style, by hand, into a notebook. But since I am a child of the internet generation and my sister is finishing up a philosophy paper before we head out for some breakfast, I'm going to copy down what I wrote.

Sitting in the Virgin Terminal at LAX. This terminal sucks. Nothing in the way of food. [EDIT: to clarify, there was an empty CPK cart, a fish and chips restaurant place with no tables, and Burger King]

I had a double cheeseburger from Burger King and feel like I'm going to hurl. How did I eat this shit when I was a kid? Has it gotten worse since then? Or have I just gotten old and spoiled by food that wasn't cooked in a grease trap. Need to make Guinness Burgers again soon.

That's what I wrote as I was waiting to board. While the terminal was weaksauce, the actual plane was pretty nice. I approve of Virgin as an airline. There was this remote control thing that handled the TV, movies, and even let you play video games. I played DOOM for the first time since I was like 12 years old. Made me feel strangely nostalgic. The dude next to me on the plane played it for like 4 straight hours, what a beast. After I landed in Boston, it was really early local time, so I went and got some Dunkin Donuts coffee, and paused to write this in my notebook:

4/2/09 5:45am
Virgin Terminal is shared with American Airlines. Just walked past a remodeled spot where I used to wait to pick up CollegeGirlfriend [EDIT: I wrote her actual name in the notebook but won't here. This is the girl I was with for 3.5 years who is now engaged to a friend of ours]. Made me a little sad/nostalgic.

Then I got on the T with my Dunkin Donuts coffee and wrote this: "Holy shit, did I miss this city."

I had to transfer to two trains, and ride the slow, trolley-esque Green Line to get to BC, but I didn't mind. It was early, it was quiet, and I kept seeing stuff that I recognized that had changed subtley since I left for LA. I'm far enough from college that I can really look back fondly now. Even though it's way too early to be awake and the weather is that classic New England dull overcast gray, it feels really good to be back in the city I call home. Now I'm relaxing at my sister's place, and in a few hours I'll get picked up by my dad to head down to Cape Cod, see the new house my family built, and carry heavy shit into it. I'll be applying to jobs from here since I brought my gargantuan laptop with me, and maybe I'll even get some writing done.

I actually just thought of a good idea for a feature script as I was writing this. Getting fired was fantastic for my sanity, and for re-evaluating my priorities. Granted I really need to find a new job ASAP, but I feel like I'm in good shape with that even in these troubling economic times. I had lunch with an agency assistant yesterday who's pretty connected and she said she'd contact some people for me.

So with that, I'm going to enjoy my little sojourn back east, and revive my creative spirit.

And carry heavy shit with my dad.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Unemployed life

I'm sleeping in, I'm reading what I want to read. I have more time with my writing, and to catch up with old friends. So far, so good.

I've applied to a few positions, but it's still to early to tell how they'll react, or if I'll even want them once I go in for the interview. I need to research unemployment insurance. If I can have my job hunt subsidized while I take some of my day to write, that could be a decent set up for a little while.

I'll be headed back home to help my parents move into their new house this weekend, but I'm bringing my laptop so I can write and job search/apply from Cape Cod.

Overall I think I'm handling things pretty well. While it sucks to be jobless, especially in this economy, I feel kinda relieved to be out of that office. It was slowly driving me insane.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Got fired today

Well, the day started like any other Friday. To be honest, work had been a bit better this week than it had been recently, although in retrospect maybe it's just that they had decided to fire me and wanted to just get off my case until they let me know. The way they went about it is still kind of shitty, but at least I'll be getting some good recommendations out of it, which is more than I can say for usual layoffs. They're still interested in me as a writer, and I even pitched them a project while I was still in the room with them, which I thought was somewhat cheeky of me, but it went over well.

Basically what it came down to is that they can tell my priority out here is to be a writer. That's what makes me a good writer, and why they always liked my creative ideas in the office. They want someone who doesn't have that ambition, who is willing to go well above and beyond the call of duty to satisfy their egos, even though my working day and night for them would not have made them better producers. They can get interns to do much of my old job for pretty much nothing, and they could tell I wasn't happy there anymore.

So I'm ready to move on. I wanted to do this anyway, and anyone who does ever read this blog will be able to tell how long overdue this was.

It'll be tough finding a new job, especially with the economy so far in the crapper, but I needed a new one. I know more of what I want to do, and I think I have the qualifications and connections that make it easier to get there now than it was back during the writer's strike when my best option was to start working for a couple guys in a pool house.

I'm going to keep writing, and I'm sure in the long run that this, like most of the "setbacks" in my life, will prove to be beneficial in the long run.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Strange timing

If I believed in astrology I'd totally think that the stars were aligning in some sort of crazy way. Immediately after MissCrazy is no longer a presence in my life, I find myself randomly reconnecting with, no joke, about six other women in my life that I'd lost touch with. Most of them were friends, one was a girl I used to hook up with who will randomly be in LA this weekend, and one was even my date to my senior Prom.

Also, while I was cycling through my facebook inbox to see an old message from my former hook up buddy I noticed that the messages from MissCrazy were back. It would seem that she's decided to unblock me from seeing her profile and twitter feed even though we're not still friends, probably in the hope that I'll check it out and see the mean things she and her friends are saying to each other about me. Really, I don't care. She can say what she wants just so long as she doesn't come around in a week wanting to get back together. I've seen the on again/off again couples before, and they're always miserable with each other and none of their friends want to be a part of the drama. I never want to be that guy again.

UPDATE: Just now another old friend told me that she was driving down from San Francisco on a whim. This is just eerie.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Somehow my job has become brainstorming reality shows

My bosses are getting more and more enamored with the idea of creating reality shows, so I find myself spending some of my time brainstorming ideas for shows I would never want to see.

And surprisingly, I still end up with a lot of good reality ideas. Frankly, they're not that hard to come up with. They're cheap as hell, and you don't need a speck of talent to make one. No wonder there are so many of them. It's kind of like cockroaches. You can kill one, but by the time you do that there's already a whole nest just waiting out of sight.

I want to work more in TV, but I want to work in good TV, REAL TV, the kind that takes effort and talent to create, challenge the imagination, and inspire as they entertain. Not something that becomes irrelevant five minutes after it airs and makes celebrities out of people who have no goddam business being famous.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

So it was premature to say I got out amicably

About six hours after MissCrazy's text saying she still thought I was a nice guy, she sent another one saying she took it back and thought I was an asshole. These kinds of flip flops are why the moniker "MissCrazy" seemed so fitting, even when we were getting along.

I guess this means she's moved on to the "hating me" phase of the breakup. I'm going to try not to think about it too much and just get on with my life.

I have plenty of good and loyal friends that I want to spend more time with. I have tons of tv shows and movies that I've been meaning to watch/study, and if you're a movie nerd like me that's a great way to spend an evening. And last but not least, there are lots of other girls in LA that would probably be better suited to me. I'm not on the prowl or anything, but at least now I can be open to something new coming along.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Woke up at 3:30am

I went to bed last night around 12:30. I woke up three hours later with an idea for a tv show and an idea for a comedy sketch. I grabbed my notebook, and wrote them down. Neither was especially brilliant upon later reflection, but they were worth writing down I guess. The only problem was, once I was awake, I couldn't get back to sleep. I was lying there, eyes closed, under the covers in a dark room, and no matter what I did I just wouldn't sleep. Eventually I gave up on the idea of sleep, got up early, and watched the second episode of Kings on Hulu (it was good).

As I was pulling into the office (already starting to feel tired) I got a text from MissCrazy, who true to form wanted to pretend like there hadn't been a fight. This is what she did the previous three times we broke up. I was just sitting down in the office, I was tired, and I had a phone call in half an hour with a woman who writes for a very prominent prime time TV show who was giving me notes on my spec pilot. So I told MissCrazy that I couldn't talk that morning,

I texted her later, telling her that I was sorry for blowing her off, and that when she had said on Friday that she was tired of all this I agreed with her, and I felt like we needed to take a break because I didn't like fighting. She seemed to accept it and take it pretty well, and even as I write this texted me again to say that she thinks I'm very sweet and wished me the best.

She was a nice girl, and it was good while it lasted, but it was due to end. I am glad I was able to get out without her thinking I was a complete asshole though. It's one of those things that I feel I need everyone to like me, even the women I break up with.

Friday, March 20, 2009

This may be the end of me and MissCrazy

There's been some weird unspoken tension between MissCrazy and I recently, and it seems she's now found the fight to use as an excuse to end things. To be honest, I'm kind of relieved. I didn't see this going long term at all, and I'm glad to be getting out before things get too complicated.

Here's what happened. Every Thursday night I try to write a spec pilot script with my roommate. This is a project I take very seriously, but due to difficulty with our schedules, we can't really find time to work on it more than once a week, and even then, we miss it sometimes. I don't cancel it lightly. MissCrazy knows this.

MissCrazy also isn't a fan of phone calls, she only likes to text. I got a text from her while my roommate and I were working, saying that she was pretty sure she had caught a cold and pinkeye. I asked if she was okay and said something amusing to cheer her up.

This morning I texted her to ask if she was feeling any better, and she got all passive aggressive and said that one of her other friends offered to bring her soup. She was pissed that I hadn't dropped everything to bring it to her last night.

Now, I've gotten her soup before when she was feeling sick. But she let me know that she wasn't feeling well last minute, and even if I had canceled my writing night to rush to her bedside, by the time I got there she would already be going to sleep, and probably in no mood for soup. And this writing project is a very big priority for me, and she knows that.

The real reason she's pissed is that I'm not making HER my top priority. She in no way makes me her top priority, so it's kind of hypocritical for her to expect that of me. On Sunday we went to Disneyland, and even though she denied it at first when I asked her, she was pissed that we left early. Roommate's girlfriend was making a big dinner for everyone and frankly I wanted to be included in that because I'd felt a bit left out when it comes to our little LA family recently. It was important to me to be there, but at the same time it showed her that my friends (who I think of like family out here) are either just as important or more important to me than she is.

But she habitually flakes out on me, canceling for the last minute. She claims it's for work, but I have the feeling that sometimes it's not. She likes going to fancy events and having rich successful guys hit on her, and I'm an assistant who can't afford to take her to the expensive restaurants in town. She frankly doesn't show me much trust or let me in, which leads me to not be able to trust her.

So when she takes this fight as an excuse to drop this whole thing, I'm perfectly happy walking away. Between work, my own writing, and the people who have been true friends to me out here, I have more than enough on my plate. I never thought of MissCrazy as "the one" and ending things now is just as good if not better than ending them at some other time down the road.